Why?

The other day I was drinking coffee and I spilled some on my crisp white shirt. Of course it was early in the morning so I’d have to wear my coffee all day, and of course it was in front of a stranger who walked up at just the right time. Thankfully, the stranger was one of the nicest ladies I’ve ever met and she offered to let me try her new Tide stick.

Why don’t those things work like they’re advertised? Or maybe Kelly Ripa just has the magic touch...